I am realizing the vital importance of following one's own rhythm and pace and honoring that. I was chatting this morning with a friend who said that she was 40 before she realized how much her life was dominated by the pace of others and how important it is for her to get rid of that and move at the pace which works for her. I told her she was lucky because I have only just started to figure that out and I'm 65! I know that part of my need for a slower gentler pace is due to my age. I ran too fast, pushing myself to be doing all the time, doing what others needed or what I thought they needed, until my adrenaline has simply run out. And I realize that part of it is the season. All of us need to remember that we are carbon based life forms and the seasonal changes happen to us as well and we too need time to reflect, what in some cultures is called "cave time." But a large part of it is my own natural rhythm. And on this Valentine's Day I think it is appropriate to remember that unless we honor ourselves, love ourselves, first and foremost, we are really incapable of loving anyone else. A big part of my healing work surrounds this issue, that I need to respect and love myself, have compassion for myself, and learn who I truly am and what things work for me.
And so recently I've changed my schedule so that it fits my rhythms and my pace. I don't have appointments before 10AM as I prefer a slower gentler start to the day. I don't want to be rushed as I get moving, doing my meditation (5 minutes, but it is helping), my yoga (5-10 minutes, but again it is working for me), sorting out the pets with litter box and food duty, tending to my sprouts, and now with all the construction, checking in with Leigh and whoever else is here to be sure I'm not needed. I don't like being rushed anymore--not sure I ever did, but rushing results in stress and tension and I don't want that. I am really at my best from 10-5, not being either a morning or an evening person and you know what--that is just fine. I used to worry about not accomplishing much in any given day, but yesterday was wonderful, for example. I did do stuff, but nothing that would look impressive on a chart or recounting, but it was a beautiful day, flowing as it would, in a very Daoist way and that was quite beautiful, in my opinion.
Therefore, I would encourage each of us not to get caught up in the rhythms of others or what others want. Obviously that does happen to some degree for us all, and fortunately I have less of that than many--one of the benefits to living alone, but it is very important to understand when we are getting caught up in another's pace and when we are honoring our own. And if there is love and respect on all sides, then it seems to me there will be a way to honor the pace of each of us in our own way and work together for the good of all.